“You don’t have a say in the matter.”
This is what Child Protective Services is telling this father. The father, who is only allowed to spend 8 hours a week with his daughter, is not allowed to actually be a father. He’s been stripped of the right to even find out what medication his daughter is being given.
I’m not a father, but I don’t think you need to be a parent to find this video both terrifying and saddening. This father may not always make the best decisions (like any parent), but he’s being told how to treat and raise his daughter by strangers.
Is this what we want for our society?
He seemed pretty calm and accepting of the situation. Is there any other info as far as why he only has 8 hrs a week with his daughter and why his wife/ex wife has a restraining order against him, and why he can’t contact her school, doctor etc? I’d be curious to know the other side of the story. There are some cases where there are valid reasons why parents and children need intervention, not necessarily a stranger or CPS. Intervention can be good and helpful. If families would intervene and help when there’s a problem then things could be worked out without outside sources like CPS (and other agencies) schools and churches etc. That’s how things used to be. Many family members don’t want to get involved and parents and children are left without accountablility and help unless an agency like CPS called. And being in that system is no place for anyone let alone a child. Because of that many children grow up physically but not emotionally or mentally.
You are correct, there is another side to the story. But the callous and irrational way that the CPS worker spoke to the father is disconcerting.
Even without the CPS or other government involvement, there would be agencies or neighbors and churches (like you said) that would deal with these issues. The problem with the government and the CPS is that they can come in and forcefully take your child and have monopolized their ability to do that.
There are certainly ways for a free society to do with parents who are unfit to raise their children, but this is certainly not the way to do it.
That case worker, or whatever her title is may have been showing restraint. Who know what the story is? We don’t know what happened. At the same time, he could be a victim made out to be a monster and it’s all lies. We don’t know. So not knowing makes it difficult to jugde the situation and the reason why the case worker acted the way she did and why they were there in the first place.
I agree, thought that isn’t the way to do it. It shouldn’t even need to go to outsiders, it should stay within the family including the extended if need be. What’s family for? But someone got CPS involved whether it was when the mother got a restraining order or whether someone reported them. CPS won’t randomly come into your life. They’re invited by someone directly or indirectly. For some children they need to be rescued and when family doesn’t want to get involved sometimes it’s necessary for someone to step into a situation. I know of a particular family where an agency was involved but they did very little until it was too late. The family didn’t want to get too involved. The grandmother said she and her husband were too old to care for the child and aunts and uncles didn’t want to. In the meantime, the child, a girl 3 yrs old was molested by her mother’s boyfriend. He had already been in prison. Both the mother and boyfriend were drug addicts, there was no food in the house etc. This little girl is still not right. She’s 6 or 7 now.
This is just an example of why “someone” needs to get involved in a child’s life and protect them. When the mother and father and family won’t, who else is there? It’s just very sad.
I was actually thinking about writing an article about how situations like this could be handled in a free society as well as if children should be considered “property” of their parents and what rights children have.
We live in an imperfect world, so there will never be perfect parents, but when you give someone a monopoly on power (CPS in this case), it is going to be abused.
I understand your point that we don’t know the entire story (although there is a 30 minute video where both sides give their arguments and reveal clues about themselves). However, if there was a dispute between the parents and the child, it is completely unethical for a third party to use force to make sure that no one else is involved and threaten violence against those who do not comply with their wishes even if those being threatened are not acting aggressively.
That would be a very interesting article and probably difficult to write. I don’t think children should be considered property and I don’t believe they should have rights that remove parental rights unless their welfare, well-being and even their lives are threatened. That’s where it gets sticky. Yes, I agree. The conversation revealed many things. I thought the case worker came off too strong at first but she was right about the soda, McDonald’s, weighing the child etc. If he’s so concerned about his daughter’s weight and about her health then he should educate himself on healthy eating and drinking. He is ignorant of that and feeds his daughter junk food but yet he wants to blame the mother. He weighs his daughter keeping track of the weight progression to use it against the mother. Is he really concerned more for his daughter health or about building a case?
Is giving your child McDonald’s and soda enough reason to have the state take away your child? Like I said, I don’t agree with everything that the father said he did, but for the CPS to say “You don’t have a say in the matter” is downright chilling.
No, I’m just saying she was right about that. I don’t think his rights were taken away for that, do you? And she even admitted to being overweight. She was just doing her job. She has no authority past her position. The judge decided the case. Again, he could be a good guy who got mixed up with the wrong person. The wife could be vendictive, could have lied. Taking away parental rights is serious. How about people who go to prison for things they didn’t do? How about parents who are verbaly, emotionally and/or abusive but people/families want to turn a blind eye because they don’t want to get involved? A free society wouldn’t work with people like that. A free society depends on honest people who admit to needing help and who don’t shift the blame. Those type of people are few and far between. This is why we have laws and why the authorities feel they can come in with force.
The reasons why you say we can’t have a free society are the reasons why I think we need one over the one we have. Can you honestly say that the authorities we have are honest people especially when you say that honest people are few and far between? If you can’t trust people to be honest, then how can you be comfortable with giving those same people the power to lord over you?
Getting the authorities involved should never be the first response yet it is most times. The problem is free society or not, you’re going to have these same issues because human nature is human nature (though there is a remedy to that that many people don’t want to hear about). Will a free society deal better with these issues? That’s where I’d find the article interesting.
the case worker seems very frustrated with this man and she probably has reason to be. this is not the first time she has heard about this man. also she is right, by weighing a child and telling her she is overweight then feeding her unhealthy foods sends mixed signals. also this may cause the child to have low esteem. it was mentioned in the beginning that the father also has mental illness. perhaps there is reason why he wasn’t told about the medication because of his negative views on medications. personally, I believe that he should be told of any medication but I do not know the whole story. also if u watch the video you will notice that a lot if cut out. Remember the father is the one secretly video taping this session and had the chance to take out anything that will make him seem unfit. There is also a reason for a restraining order they just don’t hand them out like candy. And the father can seem very calm because he knows he will be on video.